"Jesus Loves Us/Apostasy"
Jesus Loves Us All So Much
God Loves Us And JEsus is God
JEsus died for us
he sent us the comforter in John,
the Holy Spirit.
I thin that
the reason people
do bad things
is because they lose
Their Awareness
Awareness
Of God's Love.
Try to remember, that God Loves you....
He loves those that love him
but he loves us all
an apostasy is we feel far apart
from god
i learned that in my church
they talk about it all the time
in church, about how
people God's people don't feel the Love
The Love Of God
For Periods of Time in history
this has happened throughout history
and God wants his people
to COME BACK to Him
In Body, Mind, Spirit and Soul.
He wants to save us
to deliver us
to redeem us
That's is exactly why he sent his Son Jesus Christ
To Die on the Cross To Pay The Price of our Sins
So That The People of earth could
Atone
for their sins.  Jesus's sacrifice is also known
in my church, as "The Atonement"
In which he died and was crucified to atone for out sins
that we would all be Forgiven
Forgiveness to me is the thing
Jesus Brought To Mankind
Like Prometheus,
He Gave Us a Divine Gift
Of Everlasting Life
If We Only Believe in Him.
"For God So Loved The World,
That He Gave His Only Begotten Son, So That
Whosoever
Believeth in
Him
Should not Perish, But have
Everlasting life" (John 3:16)
Amen.

"I Will Never Be Alone Again"
My husband came home to me today
he's coming home to stay in mind
heart, body and spirit he is home again
gently i draw the lock of our front door
after tucking him in to bed he going to sleep
right now while i play him music.  as i lock
our front door, i realize im finally happy.  that
i will never be alone anymore because theodore
loves me more than anything, and thateven if
we are separated physically, he will
 always be with me in his heart. I know
That I Will Never Be Alone Again, for i
am carrying this love he has for me deep inside
of my heart and his hearts, In Jesus' Name,
AMEN.
~~~~~~~~~~~~The End~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"I am an Angel"
I am an Angel come to Earth
To Spend out my mortality
my kingdom is not of this world
and i fear it grows harder as i age
to belong, i never will feel like i do,
and i need not see my Wings, i Know.
I know my wings are there behind me
i can feel them in my shoulder blades
and the moment i die they will be
returned to me.  i am an angel alone,
sent to the earth to endure a sentence
of time yet i need not see
my wings for i know they are there
and should i ever need to fly away
they will carry me back to heaven!
In JEsus' Name,
Amen.

"Feeling Alone"
I was lost and confused in a dream
Lost; and so, having nowhere to go
i smiled at the irony of blood red raindrops
in the flourescence of lights from our car
it was chilly for April i drew a shaded hand
to help me cry yet no tears would come
and i vomited thick clods of dinner all over
the pavement, breathless, then curled up
into a small frightened ball and put on my
husband's jacket.  i am not allowed to wear it
but it was so wet rainy and cold and i was
not in my home as i should have been and
i was alone and it vaguely occured to me that
i would always and forever Be, alone, that never
never again would i have a friend or lover who might
understand me, but am married, and it's an abusive marriage.
When you're married you are completely alone
especially because my husb and no longer wishes to be
married to me anyway, we are just trapped
like doves in the teeth of a mortal snare
and though in pain we cannot escape one another.
In jesus' name,
Amen.

"Seeing a lost love"
If whom I saw was you
Then you are still young.
If whom I saw was was you
Then You look good and are mild
If whom i saw was you
you are not bitter like me
If whom i saw was you
the madness i loved has cooled
If whom i saw was you
i have let madness wreak my wings
and tear at the passion of my heart
If whom I saw was you
Then i have outpaced myself
If Whom I saw was You,
You No longer love me
And I can no longer love you
when i looked into your eyes
i saw hollowness and indifference,
my own soul pulsing and throbbing
with pain of the wicked hope that
that i might be you, yet in my pride
and dignity i refused to ask
i remember you as my child lover
and that is how i choose to remember
you.  that is how i choose to see you
when i return me back home
into blessed eternity.

"Sea Dragons"
A SEahorse
is a tiny dragon
it has wings
but now they
 are called fins
harmless and
beautiful, they
are the babies
of the deep.



"Gargoyles black in the snow"
Gargoyles stand
black in the snow,
 pondering eternity
their wings are
 those of bats
their faces are
those of men
though contorted
with horns and
devil's tails
fearsome haunches
terrible gripped claws
grasping their perches
like terrible angels
all fallen from heaven
they gaurd the
gateway to eternity
they stand judgement
the are not as much
beautiful as terrible
not so much kind as
stern as stone or rock
they pass judgement
on all souls that creep
beneath their shadows.

"Just Because Life is Bad Doesn't Reflect on God's Love For You"
Just Because you are suffering
isn't any reason to assume
that God doesn't like you
or that he wants you to suffer...no,
God doesn't doesn't want any not one
of his children to suffer
he provides for us all
and i think that suffering came into this world
Because of Satan.
GOD IS GOOD
he is the only truly Goodness
God LOVES you
And LOVES me
so much more than we realize
when i have a bad day i tend to
blame it on God or say, "God must be
Angry with me, or punishing me!" and i
feel so ashamed and unloved.  this is wrong
if anything god loves us even more when we suffer
and he loves every one of us
when bad things happen do not
blame God do not think he doesn't
like you or may have forsaken you, he hasn't
God is something altogether infinite
can you comprehend infinity?  I can't!
When we die we return to God
And God Loves Each
Every
Single
One
Of Us
Infinitely!
God Wants his children to come home to him.
I think when we die we finally go back home
to god
after a long journey
and there
in heaven
we can feel his infinite
love for everything.  we all have
compassion in our hearts
if you can fel compassion, you can
feel God's Love For You.
God Loves Us ALL.
In Jesus' Name,
AMEN

"Nothing Left To Lose But You"
I Have Nothing Left To Lose But You
You Theodore my only reason for living
I lost europe and i lost my city
in fact i lost my world outside my door
because i cannot leave this lonely empty cell
the only thing in this cell i have to care a damn for
 is you i have no possessions, no money, not a cent,
my computer isnt my own, my body is not my own
i am a patient and there are unseen hands pulling strings
but i've already lost all but you and you are my world
no i cannot take you out to dinner and darling i dont have
any pretty clothes to wear to make you smile
i feel like my earbobs belong to someone who deserves them
and i mutter to myself to bite back the tears i mutter that
"Money is for Sinners" and "We Must Be Strong" and the unseen
hands tearing apart out fabric that we called home
our children our pets our family our friends everyone else
there is only you, my darling Theodore.  You are the only
thing i have left to lose.  I am so afraid of losing you
for i love you and have traded all of these things just
to be with you.  Fine Then, let them take my beating heart!
Jesus be with us now for our poverty engulfs us in tears
and our cross we are losing the strength Jesus help us I pray thee.
In Jesus' Name,
AMEN/////

"A Courage Quickened Me"
A Courage Quickened Me
That I Knew Twas Right and Good
And So I did as my Heart was bidden
With a leap of faith.  Got knocked down
then got up, started
climbing again.
Prayed to god but my heart broke
when they told me i could not work
i thought i saw a glimpse of heaven
almost as though jesus were real, and
actual, as though god had smiled on me!
But who is God to smile on a person like me,
i remember, for he obviously cannot stand me
so i thought i saw heaven and then
i was thrown down into my own misfortunes
poverty, penniless, utterly bereft and cast out.
Jesus, i know not why you do these mysteries
in our lives but i believe there was a reason in time
for God to break my heart, even, this one time.
I weep for the future God Will Never Get To See
It's almost as though he doesn't Want to be happy
as though he wants me to suffer endlessly
even though, i know, my treasures are in heaven!

"Hope"
When I Close My Eyes
To Go To Sleep
The Painkillers Give me Sleep
But I can never be
truly sure
that i will
 wake up
in the morning.
I have
Faith
in God
and
there is a reason
that I am alive
I must take care of
Theodore
Without Me he would die
So I Am not afraid at night
because i have faith that God
Will let me live so i can do
what i was
born
on this earth
to do, which is
to take care of my husband
Theodore.
If something happens to me,
He'll never make it
on his own!  So I
Just Pray and
Have Faith
in God's Grace
I'm Needed Here
Theodore Needs Me
That is why
i am here!
In Jesus' Name,
AMEN.////

An Oriental Rug
powder blue, ivory, clay, and cream
detailed as any elaborate dream
there are gardens in this carpet and keys
symbols and signs to cipher noone notices
them but i know they are real
Lipsticks
Bloody Red Satin and
Petal Pink Electric
Wine Tints darker than
red wine
and white nude lipstick
to frame my lips
beauty is real and alive in me
I am real
I am alive
and I am beautiful
The Black Crayon Smears into my Eyes
The Black Crayon Has Been Turned To Brown
But I remain beautiful
cream makeup to cover imperfections with a sponge
perfume for day and perfume for night
Diamonds
Diamons
 cascading
 down my neck
 and
earlobes
 and forehead
my wedding ring
all worn thin with love
i would trade it all for my wedding ring
A Mediterranean Clay Bowl
Ceramic with flourishing florentine
italian designs symbolic and floral
a classic print i've been to the factory
in italy where they sell these ceramics
and i buy them when i see them on sale
in america
because i've spent hours at the kiln
the very kiln where they are made
and i smile to myself, knowing
that i was once wealthy and free
that i haveseen the wonders of the world
And That I would trade them all,
all and every one, gold and marble
and all, i would trade them for my husband!
My husband is growing older
i treasure every moment spent with him
love far outweighs earthly treasures
the things i've seen cannot compare to
my true love sleeping in his own bed!

"Growing Old Together"
Our faces are getting older
laugh lines at the corners
of our smiles, frown lines
at the furrowing of the brow,
and exhaustion lines crow's feet
at the corners of our eyes.
We Are Growing Older Together.
I wouldn't have it any other way!
Amen.

I dream of a strand of Cream Pearls
I dream of Colored stones and tiny Glass animals
hand-blown, and porcelain doves and roses
Cherubim of ivory and white glass slumbering
and lonely days spent missing you i do, i do,
i do miss you, even when you aren't away
even when you aren't away
In Jesus' Name,
Amen////

"Life Is Good"
Blue Powder Glitter Dust
Sands of Time All is Lost
Golden Glitter Gloss Shines on
Snakeskin boots and purse
cell phone ringing on the counter
a little lonely, in the kitchen
a sunny day sun slides carelessly
across the ceiling and slants the shadows
of the soft blue-tinted room
paper flowers sewn together
and littered on plastic stems
make the room so beautiful
paper roses, white roses, spring flowers
blue crystal vases and blue glass gems like tears
a day at the beach's worth of seashells
scattered into a silver bowl golden earrings
and feathers streamers for long hair hawk feathers
and golden hair combs rimmed with pearls
they shine like stars in my black hair
like little miracles are the pearls that drape
my lonf soft gentle black hair to my waist
a little stringy at the ends but never to be cut
it just lingers and by and by it grows longer and
longer, and a ship in a bottle and a pirate ship outside
a bottle and some porcelain dolls long treasured packed
away in cardboard moving boxes making me cry
for i miss them for a dollar you can buy recipe cards
with little muffins and bumblebees or miniature journals
at the craft store and you can write a story and dream a
dream and thank God for Dreams and Thank God for
Those Who Dream Them, and thank God For Recipe Cards
and empty blank journals makes me dream as long as they
are real people go on dreaming.  there is nothing pointless about
stationery or pens of gold that write well nor bookmarks
and if you can even dream enough, then lose yourself in a book
and a thousand books i try to lose myself into them every day
at least one that is not my own and each day i listen to the bible
on audiotape and each day i write a new poem and you know what,
it isn't in vain at all!  It is hope for the human race wheter anyone reads
them i read them.  I read them, Lord.  When i die they will be my spirit
living on, for I've published them with my favorite bookseller and none
other, which but the best.  And dreams are all in all and all in all are dreams.
Dreamer I dream on While my baby slumbers underneath the moon and stars
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

"On A Trip To Wisconsin"
Crisp, soft floral-print sheets
a few layers of gentle blankets comforter and quilt
ensures that we stay the warmest while we
cuddle in bed every chance that we get,
your skinny arms and legs wrapped tightly around me
like a little child just like you are a child and in a way
you are, your are my child, my husband, my beautiful boy
noses rubbing and hands clasping one another's backs
we hold one another like two halves of a whole
never to be separated.  This week you must travel
to Wisconsin in our little tuna-can-car, and i am
very worried that neither you nor our car will make the trip
still i am going to be in constant prayer for you my husband
traveling is cold and lonely and fearsome, frightful, why must you
leave me here to sleep in our soft bed alone and cold for four nights?
When you return i will wrap my arms and legs are you and yours
around mine.  when you get older intercourse isn't what we want
so much anymore, we just want to press our bodies against
against one another and absorb one another's body heat.
Godspeed you my child, come home to me safely!
In Jesus' Name,
Amen.

"Memory"
A Dark Night
in a crowded downtown street
flooded with people and cars
no, thoe aren't fairies or large stare--
they're streetlamps and christmas lights
in the trees
it is raining pretty heavily.
Windshield Wipeds Creaking and Groaning
Back, forth,
Back, Forth
To The rythim of the radio
with the windows down
i'm not worried about my hair
the windshield wipers
swipe back and forth as the sky
rains down puddles of tears
-raindrops, and they blur in a mess on
the windows and windshield, because
the wiper blades
need badly to be replaced.
red taillights of traffic adorn
the raindrops and shade the night
we are trying to get back home
after a date i am a b it drunk
on a sleepy red house wine
and a mojito frozen drink
and i am asking you to marry me,
as usual.  and you wont answer
and finally you say yes
so i put the seat to recline back
and i lay back and close me eyes
and pretend we are not there
but home, nestled safe and warm
underneath our comforter in our
big softest
bed./  "Take Me Home, Daddy-O!"
I repeat over and over, he is driving
Windshied wipers casting away
red stained tears
they are all dreams
they are all dreams.
In JEsus' Name,
Amen.////

"How I met My Husband"
This is the story of a boy
Who Was Homeless
And Fully Grown Up, too
You See GRownups need Homes, too
He needed to be adopted
he was an orphan
his mother had recently died of cancer
whom he loved so dearly
and missed so much, that
twas a wonder he survived her death himself.
He was homeless
and it didn't bother him, to be homeless
it was just on those cold nights
he had gone to college for a four year
paramedic degree but been
unable to graduate, and therefore
could find no work, no job.
in fact when i met him he was living at
a paramedic rescue station for ambulances
he had been living there for about a year
by the time i met him
he slept on a couch
it didn't have a bed, it was just a couch
and he watched tvday after day went by
the paramedic station wouldn't give him a job but
they let him stay there as a home and he slep
on a sofa he bathed there and dressed there
when i met him
he was the most beautiful boy
that i had ever met in my life.
He took me to his paramedic station
and the first thing he said was, "You've Got
To Meet
My Dad!" and he took me to a photograph
on an empty refirerator
a page size, very old photograph
of his father before he had died
his father had died when he was three
years old, hit by a drunk driver.
I said, "So your father's not alive now?"
"No,he died when i was a baby.I'm an Orhpan,"
he explained.  Then he asked me
where would i like to go to eat
and he said "Oh!  Oh! I Know the perfect
place!  It's a mexican buffet in downtown
ill take you there and we can eat!
So we went in his car.  I ordered a vegetable
quesadilla, and it the best one i ever had, because
i was in love.  We sat side by side in this
enormous booth against a window and i, i think
i held his hand
for the first time.  (i have to stop here because
I'm starting to cry...)

"So Many Things To Fight For"
There are so many things to fight for
in this life, so many causes to uphold
and defend and stand for like plus size
women in bikinis in barbados and hamsters
who will never know testing of products on them
and guinea pigs eating green grass in the sunshine
and little boys' dreams and big boys' dreams
and people being hurt by disease and cruelty
of others people being picked on and even
beaten up for no reason, hunger and the filling
of hunger, loneliness and the reaching out in need,
bird seed to feed the wild birds from your feeder
water to water the garden that is a glorious jungle
rooftop gardens and undiscovered blogs and books
that nobody has read but which hold within thenselves
whole worlds and lives and universes, children who have
a hard time adapting to their peers and gods that should be
prayed to but are no longer believed in, and santa claus, and
the easter bunny and the tooth fairy and little wishes
and birthdays when people need their special day
weddings and wedding gowns and parties needing guests
the dead people who love us and need to be remembered
or is it, rather, trying to leave them behind, that is so difficult?
--Either way, little-supported causes are a beautiful thing
i myself am one that how you make friends by paying attention
to other's needs, lost causes are a beautiful thing veterans
unattended parties obscure magazines restaraunts going out
of business yes, i tell you, there are, indeed So Many Things
To Fight For.
In JEsus' NAme,
Amen.////

"E.N.D. (Energy NEver Dies)"
There is Something In A Dream
That Cannot Be Denied
A Dream-Breaker is A Killer
You Have To Have Faith
Don't LEt Them Steal Your Dreams
Don't Let Anyone Suppress your Soul
Fight Like A She-Lion against the Bear-Trap
Fight on and on and never give up
never give up hope
when you are at your lowest times
is when you are at your best,
when you cannot speak to justify
the feelings that you feel, is when
you're really onto something
don't let them smother you
don't let anyone take your dreams
run for the western Wailing Wall
Doesn't every city-state
have its Barriers?  Break Them.
Break through to the other side
it doesnt have to be a better life
it just has to be your freedom
you can't stop it screaming out
There is something in A Dream
That Cannot Be Denied
The Will Of A Heart Is What
Set The Stars Into Motion
They Will NEver Kill
Your Spirit, Your Soul
They May Kill Your Body But
 Your Soul No They Cannot Kill That
No They Can not Kill Your Soul
So While You Are Alive,
Make It Beautiful-- Your Soul,
Make it into a work of beauty
Make it something you can shine in darkness
cultivate your soul
and never let anyone
anyone
in the whole world, never let them
take it away
it is our divine spark
in science they have a saying
that is a scientific fact: E.N.D
E.N.D. Stands for "Energy Never Dies"
So the soul never dies
and they aren't telling us but its
it goes somewhere
this life is fleeting
moments are tangible and fleeting
the intangible is where we go
when we dream, if you ask me
and it is within our hearts
when we are awake
A Dream Is A Thing That
Cannot Be Denied.
Don't ever let them
take that away from you!!!!"
E.N.D (Energy Never Dies)
In Jesus' NAme,
Amen.

"Life Goes On (Through HEartbreak)"
Life Goes On
and on
and
 on
it's not over until
it's over
you do not take your own life
it isnt yours to take
it is a point of honor, for me,
that i survive as long as
i am alive
life goes on
you take your pills
and you'll feel better
you'll cry yourself to sleep
and you'll feel better
tears heal
sleep heals
gifts heal
food heals
time passing can only
make you stronger
they say "what doesn't kill you
Makes your relationship Stronger"
heartbreak can be soothed
it isn't over until he's not home anymore
until he's been gone for a month
that's when it's over
and life, life must go on
you pick up what's left of your internal organs
and struggle to get into a rescue helicopter
all the while hoping with all you heart that
your true love is true
that he will rescue you
the fact is, we don't
Want
 To Move On
at least i don't
the tears i cry
are something divine and intangible that i
cannot explain they are prayers
in darkness my little lamb my child
my baby, he out in the
cold
cold
darkness right now, and i think to myself.,
"Woman, you've got to Wait For Him!"
He'll Come Home (He Always Does)
And through the tears i find that
life goes on
time passes and im still me
im still breathing im not dead im alive
and that what matters
be patient and wait on the Lord
The Lord Always Delivers
Wait On The Lord
Life Goes On!
In Jesus' Name,
Amen////

"Despair"
When I am feeling Lost
And All The World
 Cannot Console me,
When i feel like im faliing
through petals of roses
and violets only to die
when i hit the bottom,
i pray to my god but
God doesn't answer
in fact god's taught me
that life is suffering
so when i am in pain
i should be in pain
because i am a sinner
and i should feel bad
because i am bad
i feel these things that
break my heart and i
lose myself in the mirror
i lose myself in myself
all entangled where noone
can find me ever again
i lose myself in myself
and i feel better again.
In JEsus' Name,
Amen

"Courage!"
Courage Is The Most Beautiful Thing
It Gives One Angel's Wings
And Fills us with HEroic Things
Inside you heart--although you've tried,
these courageous things cannot be denied
To stand up for another in time of need
Or Bite Your Lip Or Hurt OR Bleed
To Bleed I something woman knows
I cannot have a child but, Oh!
If i could i give her all and all the World
In Thee I Pray Be My Wings Unfurled.
In JEsus' Name,
Amen.

"Don't Cry, Child." (To my husband Theodore Land)
Don't Cry, Child.
I Will Repair All
Of Your Broked Toys
And Call up Santa
Just To Put You On His
Big Lap, For You Know
Santa Loves You Lord KNows
He Loves You More Than
Than Me.  So Don't Cry Child.
If you become stung
by a bumblebee and weeping
run to my arms
oh I will hold you
we will rebuild
your sea-tumbled sandcastles
I will buy you
that big house
and i water your garden
Don't Cry, Child
You Are Loved
You Are Loved
You Are Not ALone
In This Cruel World
You Are Loved
You are Loved
I Love you so
Here, Let me die for you
there some apple sauce
in the corner of your smile
marry me child
don't cry anymore
I will buy you new toys
and a new castle
and new things
you can mess up
Don't Cry Child
Lord Know that
I Love You More
I Love You More
More, Theodore
More, My Theodore
I Love You
infinitely
MORE!
In JEsus' Name,
Amen.////

"Burned Photographs"
I cannot see you again in this life
Because That would Be Happiness
And Happiness is on The Shelf
Hopelessly high above my reach
But When I See Your Face
When I come inside to look for you
i see Theodore Burning His Photographs
Of Every Girl He's Ever Loved
And Every Dream He's Ever Lived
Burning them to cheer me up
as though cutting himslef might make me smile
---And I Realize we're married, he and I
And We Can Not Look Back Ever Again
Though our hearts may Falter Yet Our Wills are True
I Take Theodore's Hand and We Run
Into the night, headed straight into hell
ready so ready to fall face down in our side-by-side Graves
When all the years of our life are spent
we are going to runaway from our pasts
all of you will fade so far away behind
the memories won't hurt so much then, anymore
and maybe i can breathe again and when i
hold you you Theodore, i just know i am so
Brave, i'm the Bravest Person I Know
There Will never be anyone as brave as me
And Theodore is The One For me
And Let Them Live Our Lives Theodore and I
We take each others hands last night and Jumped
Jumped off a cliff hanging into the future
if there is such a thing as a future
much less a future with any hope but i
took your hand and we jump
your tear streaked cheeks are crying as you cut
the envelopes of random bills with her name on it
into a million hated pieces and all his dreams with them
and then when he is done he looks up at me and smiles
the most beautiful smile in all the universe a broken hope
and i know i would kill for him in the street and i
i smile back at him from my lonely tea
knowing in my heart that there is no turning back
It is Theodore and I Going On, Forever
All Dreams of memories must be forgotten
And He is my Sweet Baby And I Would Kill For Him.
I Would Kill For Him In The Street That's all I need to know now.
In JEsus' Name,
Amen.

"Someday"
Jesus, i Don't know
Why
you do the things you do
sometimes.  i try to
listen.  then in comes
Satan, and I can't
tell one from another
and i realize
i'm really tired
then i wonder
how long
i have been
in pain
and i say
to myself,
Jesus knows best.
maybe someday
someday
someday
far away
we will understand
but not now
we can't right now.
In Jesus' Name,
Amen/////

"Story"
Born Into A Wealthy Family
Spent entire Inheritance on own education
commited to insane asylums and medicated harshly
met and married a homeless young man living at a fire station
brought him home to apartment and lived happily ever after
became penniless and lived off charity indefinitely
wrote fourteen volumes of poetry and fairy tales for all ages
sold them at barnes and noble
listed husband as coauthor of each book
didn't make any money
Lived Happily Ever After
Doesn't Regret A Single Thing.

"Open Your Heart!"
Open Your HEart to all the love
Give, do not recieve
Love more more than being loved
let you heart be full
full of JEsus, full of joy and love
full of the holy spirit
give thanks to God
for the times you feel happy
and pray to God When You Feel Sad
God Loves Those Who Love Him
If You Love God, He Loves You Much More
No Matter How much you love God, he still, amazingly
loves you even more than that!
God loves me.  In dark and light
in good times and bad times
in safety and in dagerous times
he is always with me, that i need not
feel alone.  he is the comforter.
give to others, be kind to everyone
if it isn't goodness, it isnt jesus
sacrifice all your pride to humility
finally, Kindness has Courage In It.
Ask not so much what God Can Do For You,
Instead, Ask What You Can Do For God.
He loves us all.
mercy and forgiveness belongs to all of us
every single soul god has a plan
for everyone from the tiniest ant to
the highest king.  God Loves you More
more than he hates the devil.  Be brave
success is really, moving a single grain of sand
in any way you can anywhere you can
its the effort that counts
walk by faith walk in the light God Says,
"I Have Not Given You A Spirit Of Fear"
In JEsus' Name,
Amen////

"The Battle That You Fight"
The Battle The Each of us Faces
It Turly
Verily
Our Own Personal
World.  The Dreamers-- no!  They
cannot
never
take
that
away
from
us!
In our solitude
There is hope
there is light
there is peace
there is the holy spirit
the songs that we sing
are not for mortal tongue
really....they are
hymns to god.
Those who read
the language
of the Stars
in the heavens
are the heroes

also, death is not in vain.
even the stars die.  when we die,
we give
Our Own Light
To The Spirit
God
Energy
The Ubniverse
Goodness Itself
It is an act of courage
and goodness.
No death is in vain.
All the creatures
of the earth
all the stars
in the sky
are living and we
ALL
every one of us-- Fear
Fear Death.  But it isn't so much
the fear that hurts, it's
The Pain!
In Jesus' Name,
AMEN.///////

"Your HEart"
The Part In You
That Feels
Joy And Sorrow
Sadness and Hope
All The feelings
Is
Your Heart.
Your heart, nobody
can ever
take
that
away
from you!  It will hold.
Lord, The HEart IS Like a Golden Vessel
Into Which all Hope and Dreams Are Poured
In My HEart are all my hopes and dreams
And The World, life, tries to take them away
I have an angel gaurding My Heart
And I am gaurding my heart as well.
The Line is Strong
Between us; It Will
Hold.
Theodore Has My Heart
It Is Gaurded By One Angel
All In White
Should My HEart Break, I Too
Shall Fall
and falter
and Fail
And
Bite
Grim, Into
The Bare Dust!
My Heart!
In JEsus' Name,
Amen,.////

God Often Send
His Bravest
Strongest
Kindest
BEST ANGELS
into
his Very HARDEST
BATTLES
i believe in The Lord
Amen.////

"To My Husband"
I don't care what you look like
I don't care if you're crying or weak
I don't care if you're mean or angry
I don't care about you getting older
I don't care what anyone thinks about you
I don't care about having no money
I don't care about the time i wait for you
I don't care about no sex or kisses
I don't care what they say about you
I don't care if you hit me a thousand times
I will love you in the dark
I will love you in the light
I will love you in between
I will love you forever
I will love you forever
nothing can come between us
just relax let your burdens fall into my lap
and i will soothe thee and pray thee love me
in return,
In JEsus' Name,
Amen

"Pain"
Pain I Cannot Capture
The Emotion of Pure Pain
Its a sick, morose thud like
a lead weight strangling one's
heart you could call it heartbreak
but its more like a thousand knives
suddenly revealing themselves from within
a teddybear, the softest teddybear
and coming for you its a heavy b urden
to bear in knowing that noone loves you
but your family and your family won't
let you fly so you feel ridiculous
all the time, so absurd, these breasts
an irony of a wrathful cruel Godhead.
So Beautiful, so fair, so Hopeless
and yet i never give up hope
every day i get older but i never
give up hope that we can have
a life and money and home
and a baby
i never give up
i've never given up on other dreams
even when they laughed me in the face
and i didn't feel anything but sadness
i pity the one one who laughs at an unstealable
dream.  i have dreams
That nobody can steal
And A Fire In My Heart
That Godhead Cannot Extinguish.
We Struggle On
In JEsus' Name,
Amen.

"Song For Myself"
The Burdens
Which I Have Borne
Are Comparable to
Sampson and Delilah
And The Children
That I Will never
Get To Bring
Into
This
World
My Father Wright
Has Closed up my womb
Forbidden to have a baby
or we will be homeless
this is the saddest thing
i have ever heard
and it is my own song.
In Jesus' Name,
Amen.////

...And So, I Went Walking Among
The windblown meadow grasses
and felt their oats with my fingers
crumbling, crumbling down, down
there is a peace in my heart that knows
that whatever comes, it cannot hurt
my loved ones.  i know this because
i believe this in my whole heart and i
 would take their pain and bear it
for them,  No, Lord, I forbid any to trouble
the waters of The Pool that is deep dark
and dim!
In JEsus' Name,
Amen.//

"Madeline's Lullaby"
Lullay Lulloo, Lullaby
My Sweetest Baby
Thou Shalt Never Fall
Thou Shalt Never Fear
The Darkness of Night
Or The Chaos Of Day
Thou Shalt be safe from harm
All The Days of Thy Life
And All The Stress They Have
Oh, Princess, it will never be
Yours!  My Sweetest Child
Grow in your home, Grow
And Thrive, Love and Live
My Sweetest Baby, I am ever By
I am always and ever by, watching
over thee by night and day.
Lullay lulloo, lulla-by!